One way to Finland D -4! And with that a lot of confused thoughts and feelings.
Since I took the decision to move back to Finland for a while, I’ve been annoying my friends every day with things like: “I must be completely crazy to go there”, “It’s going to be so cold all the time”, “It’s raining there, and only about +18 C !”, “I’m so happy to see all my friends and my family!” “I’ll eat all the things I haven’t eat in so long time”, “Finish people are so strange that I will not be able to stay there for a long time” , “I’ll go to sauna every day”…. And so on…
The problem is that I’ve been saying for everybody last years, that I don’t like Paris anymore, it’s too big, too noisy, too much transportation, too much people, too expensive etc, but now that I know I’ll leave, I’m feeling really really nostalgic and I actually like the life here, a lot! Certainly this feeling comes also from the fact that I’m not having the same routines that I had last years. I m not working all the time, so I have more time to see my friends and walk around. And probably, because I know I’m leaving, I’m looking things differently also.
And as I have had time to meet friends, I’ve also realize that I have great friends here! With the rupture from my boyfriend, I’ve been loosing very important people. Just because that’s the way it is. When you brake up with some-one you keep your friends, and he keeps his. And sometimes it’s not possible to keep everybody, even you want to. And that’s been difficult. But luckily I’ve kept my friends and realized that I have awesome people around me here. And more time passes, and the day I’ll leave approaches, more I’m feeling sad, just because I don’t want to leave these great friends.
But hey! I know, what you are all thinking: “You will see them again”, “It’s not a farewell”, “France is your home, you’ll always come back”… And you are right! I am sad, and not as excited as I was in 2009 when I left Finland, but I’m confident. During these last 6 years I went to Finland once a year for max 10 days, and during those holidays I always got to see my friends in Finland, and almost all of my very close friends have been visiting me in Paris, at least once! And what I’ve understood, they are all happy that I’m going back now and we’ll have more time to spend together, than last years.
So, I’m sure I’ll keep my good friends in Paris and I’ll meet them every time I’ll come back. Because yes, I’m sure I’ll miss Paris and France a lot, I don’t know how things will go in the future, but I’ll always come back to France. Always.
This week have been really awesome, even I had some difficult days.
I had to spend 2 days in my old apartment, to wait for the company who was going to send some of my luggage to Finland. The 1st day they told me to be at home from 11h to 16h. The guy arrived around 15h30 and told me he wasn’t aware that there will be so “bulky” luggage, so he couldn’t take them (of course I had given all the size-information when I did the order!). After 3 calls I was confirmed than someone else will come tomorrow (my birthday, and I already had some plans for that day) and I should be at home between 11h and 16h, again! I wasn’t happy but I didn’t have a choice. The next day I waited until 17h that someone finally took my luggage (it was the same guy who wasn’t able to take them the previous day!). After that I was tired, sad, very pissed of, and thinking that I still need to take the metro to cross the whole city, with some other luggage which I was going to take in the plane with me… And then one of my friend called me and told she will pick me up with her car, because it was my birthday and I really shouldn’t be sad and stressed that day! I’m so grateful for her! And also for all the others who came to meet us on picnic near the Seine, and I had a great evening and forgot all my worries!
And in the beginning of the week it was the 14th of July, french National day. Traditionally all fire stations in Paris organize a party the 13th, and I had never been in those parties… Even I’ve spent many National days in France. So, with 2 friends we decided to do that this year. Only we took a little too long aperitif at home first, and left for the party around midnight only… At that time there was so much people that we didn’t get into the place. But it didn’t matter, we walked around Paris, had a great night with a lot of Rosé and talking. And the next day with the other of my friends’, we went to see the fireworks in Champs de Mars, front of the Eiffel Tower, and it was so beautiful with all the french musics that I even let a little tear run out… 😀
So all this to say, that moving from a country to another is not simple, and to have a lot of friends in different countries is not always easy either, but it’s such a richness to have all those people all around the world! And that’s why I’m very happy to meet one of my very good friend from Brazil, who’s in Paris tomorrow…. And my good friends in Finland next week!
Time will show how things will go, but first I’ll enjoy my friends and the great countries which are my home at the moment.